Plan to attend our Good Friday Service at 7:00 PM on March 29.

November 2, 2014

[Extra]Ordinary Faithfulness: In Marriage

Speaker: Steve Bice Series: Colossians: The Glory of Christ Topic: Colossians Scripture: Colossians 3:17–3:19

“And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them." - Colossians 3:17-19

Our ordinary lives are extraordinary when lived in faithful obedience to our faithful God.

Many of us want to be radical for Christ and world changers and get doing the next best thing. But maybe, just maybe if we consider who God has made us to be, where he has placed us, and how he has gifted us in our very ordinary lives and see that it is in fact God who is at work in us in the ordinary, even mundane, things of this life we will, in all biblical reality, become radical in all the “ordinary” that we feel defines us.

We may or may not ever be called to be missionaries in what we perceive to be an exciting part of the world. You may never speak to hundreds or thousands of people. You may never write anything that gets published. You may never do anything that this world considers extraordinary. But Paul reminds us in our text that the most common and ordinary relationships that all of us are involved in to some extent are, in fact, if lived in the name of the Lord Jesus, very extraordinary.

1. Called to be an [Extra]Ordinary Wife (v. 18)

To submit, as the New Testament writers use it, is to voluntarily yield to someone else, particularly to someone who has God-given authority. Submitting is an intelligent choice to follow someone else’s lead, particularly when God has given them the authority to do so.

  • In what ways does our culture and our flesh work against the biblical teaching of "submission?"
  • Does submission have anything to do with superiority or inferiority? Why? Where do we see the greatest example that must inform our answer? Look to 1 Corinthians 15:27-28 and consider the godhead.
  • What are some ways that submission in marriage was mentioned in the sermon? How do those examples play out in your own marriage? What other ways might submitting look like?
  • How can a wife show "respectful submission" to her husband? What ways were mentioned and what are some other possibilities? Think of your own marriage as you answer.

Quote from a chapter on the role of a wife in Love That Lasts, by Gary and Betsy Ricucci:

[God-glorifying submission] begins in her (the wife’s) heart and is displayed in expressions of respect towards her husband. (Ephesians 5:33) (taken from “The Role of a Wife”, Betsy Ricucci)

How to demonstrate respect for your husband:

  • Listen attentively while your husband is speaking.
  • Seek your husband’s counsel first.
  • Always speak respectfully about your husband to others.
  • Regularly communicate what you appreciate about your husband.
  • Daily pray for your husband.
  • Make your husband’s requests a priority.
  • Regularly ask for your husband’s evaluation of how well you demonstrate respect. 

  • In what ways is it alright to not "respecfully submit" according to the sermon? Why are these things true?
  • What is a wife's role in helping her husband grow? And what are good ways to go about fulfilling that role?
  • How is a wife's respectful submission influential to an unbelieving or disobedient and lazy husband?

2. Called to be an [Extra]Ordinary Husband (v. 19)

Husbands are called to LOVE their wives, and not be harsh with them. Utilizing Ephesians 5:25-33 we see how a husband should do this.

Husbands are called to love with SACRIFICIAL SERVANTHOOD.
Husbands are called to love with a SANCTIFYING LOVE.
Husbands are called to love with a DEPENDENT LOVE.

  • How does the gospel inform husbands how they should love their wives? Look to Philippians 2 and Romans 5 in particular to inform your answer.
  • In what ways can a husband sacrifice for their wife? Evaluate your level of sacrifice and service. Don't beat yourself up...but in what specific ways can you grow in this? And how do you plan on doing so?
  • How is a husband to partner with God in sanctifying his wife? Look at Ephesians 5 again for the general answer.
  • Consider the specific ways you can lead that are mentioned in the sermon. How can you lead your wife into a deeper relationship with God? How can you lead her to a better understanding of the gospel? How can you humbly lead her to see and put to death the sin in her life? How can you lead her in growing to love and desire fellowship in the church family? How are you doing in these areas? In what specific ways can you grow? And how do you plan on doing so?
  • Why is the husband's love to be a "dependent love?" Dependent on what? Who? What does that look like specifically? 

other sermons in this series